DNA Edit: In master’s service!

For all his fraudulent dealings, Lalu Prasad Yadav’s earthy sense of humour and outlandish statements make him one of the most interesting characters in Indian politics. Sensing an adverse verdict in the fodder scam, he had, in his characteristic style, whined to the special CBI judge that jail would be a cold place for him. Stripped off creature comforts and trappings of power, Lalu, the rare politician who has tasted prison food earlier, wasn’t willing to lower his status to that of an ordinary criminal.

His adversaries can raise a hue and cry, but the RJD chief thinks he deserves to be served by his personal attendants in Ranchi’s Birsa Munda Central Jail. A couple of lackeys getting jailed voluntarily in the spirit of selfless service is the stuff of ballad; a story for all the acolytes in all the world to remember when their great leaders would be serving prison terms. Gardening and other such menial jobs do not befit the stature of a messiah of the masses. What are a few cases of corruption amounting to a thousand crores? In public perception, an honest politician is an oxymoron. So, let there be rules, but remember the exceptions: Film stars, politicians, godmen and businessmen who cannot be clubbed with other convicts.

Lady Justice can wear a blindfold in her pursuit of objectivity, yielding neither to fear to favour, but prisons are an extension of society where favours can be bought with money and influence. Lalu draws his quota of privileges from the same corrupt system that has allegedly provided ‘five-star comfort’ to politicians V Sasikala, Bibi Jagir Kaur, Suresh Kalmadi and Amar Singh, industrialist Subrata Roy, and godman Asaram Bapu, to name a few. Sometimes, the court approves certain perks, but in most cases, all it takes is greasing the right palms.

While serving his previous sentence for another fodder scam case, it is said that Lalu was at a home away from home: he had a TV set, two personal cooks, was entitled to speak to his visitors for long hours and even allowed to stroll for an extra half hour. Virtually all prisons in India run on a well-oiled system of bribes and extortion, where a prisoner’s status is determined by his financial and political clout. Equality before the law is a utopia, believed mostly by idealists and village idiots. The criminal justice system, however robust it may appear on paper, is riddled with loopholes for corruption to proliferate.

It is instructive to look at the prison population to gauge the deep inequalities fostered by an inhumane system. A huge chunk of the population languishing in jails are hopelessly poor. Lalu and his ilk know that the bubble of public censure won’t last for long. The RJD has already refuted the charges that Madan Yadav and Laxman Yadav are Lalu loyalists, while admitting that they are RJD workers. It’s a lie that insults a toddler’s intelligence. Lalu is in a “special” cell where no one except for those applying officially can meet him, said the jail authority. With his status officialised, the perks will follow undercover.