Just four weeks ago, we welcomed our ‘NRI family’ to Mumbai as they arrived for their 2011 holiday — this time all the more welcome as all four (my brother-in-law Ajai, wife, Rachna and kids, Aparajita and Niharika) had come together after almost five years. So, my son, Gaurav, and I found ourselves at the airport waiting for them and their 15 bags to come out. What seemed like hours later they surfaced and we returned home in the dead of night, proudly showing off the Worli Sea Link.
While we sipped hot cups of tea to stay awake and chat, the kids found their own level of comfort, though Gaurav did dash into a bedroom to call the other three girls (his Pune-based sister Aakanksha and Vashi-based cousins Vasundhara and Jyotsna) when he was at an awkward loss of words to keep the conversation going.
Once the ice was broken, jet lag notwithstanding, the gang bonded for good. A tie that was reinforced as the absentees descended in full strength for raksha bandhan. Of course, in between, all of us had met, played Taboo, gorged on pani puri (the eternal family favourite) and watched movies (Harry Potter, of course!) with commendable enthusiasm.
Interestingly, in the last few weeks, I got the chance to watch my twosome interact with two sets of cousins, for the festival. While on the one hand, Gaurav was the only brother in a group of sisters on one side (the paternal one); on the other (maternal side) Aakanksha was the only sister in the group of brothers (Saumil, Gaurav, Kunal, Rohan, Rohit and Niranjan).
The adults on both occasions (separate events for raakhi) had to do little but feed the children’s appetites with differing quantities of food… (the gathering where the boys dominated obviously devoured more) but it was interesting to see how they were bonded by blood as well as friendship. That prompted a conversation among the adults on how loosely linked the Gen-Next often is — how they are friends-oriented rather than family driven. A fact that I had often heard my mother say about me, especially in the last few years — that I had lost touch with most of my family members and that I did not encourage my children to keep in touch with those of their ilk.
I — as a parent and child — agree. Growing up in a huge, extended family of uncles, aunts and siblings, we had a closeness fostered by my parents, and of course, by those of their generation. Friends I had, but most of our conversations revolved around studies (sad to say I was a nerd but luckily my kids are not) and it was the family that formed the fabric of our social lives.
Today, friends have taken over and how! I am sure all you parents would agree that our offspring are often glued to the phones, stuck to the computers and have turned the TV remote into an extension of their bodies. And of course, BBM and Facebook are bywords in their lives. (Not that I blame them for even I discovered an old colleague now located in Canada and we ganged up for lunch), family meetings have dwindled, and we meet only during festivals, weddings and the like which provide fond Kodak moments for all of us to treasure. No wonder we cherish them in the form of photographic impressions that last forever even if they fade away.
But this time, I had no complaints. Family took precedence and how! Now as we wait for our ‘NRI family’ to fly away, it is obvious to all of us that this visit has created closer links between us all — as a birthday got celebrated, shopping got done, late-night chat sessions ate up the hours of darkness. And, of course, that one important thread has tied a knot, hopefully one that lasts forever.
